Me and my husband
Me: I tooted.
Paul: Me too.
Does anyone actually know what you have to do when people are singing happy birthday to you.
My friend Zack has a theory:
madehimsaycomfychairs: roranicus-pondificus: textbookenigmatic: sublimesublemon: Captain Jack is the Face of Boe. Captain Jack cannot die. Captain Jack was once a Time Agent, or pretends to be one. Captain Jack wears a vortex manipulator. Dorium Maldovar sold River a vortex manipulator “fresh off the wrist of a handsome Time Agent.” Dorium Maldovar works with the Headless Monks from...
mynamestouya: fuckyeahashes: pablogerudo: Being body positive doesn’t mean you have to find every body type attractive. It’s okay to not find thin girls attractive, or only be attracted to meaty boys. It’s also okay to not find fat girls attractive, or to only be attracted to skinny boys. Or anyone in between! Just as long as you recognize that it’s only your personal preference and not some...
Grooms first time they see their brides on their...
rocketshipsuperstar: staylift-ed: can you imagine being in a horrific accident and developing amnesia and your family bringing you home from the hospital and you open your computer and find your own tumblr? oh WOW
pinkbaron: thorhead: pretty much the most accurate of the nightbloggers you will ever see is when barbossa’s crew get exposed to moonlight in curse of the black pearl you best start believing in 3am posts miss turner you’re in one
me: bumps into mannequin in a shop